Alright parents....it's Wednesday...and that means IGNITE is TONIGHT!! Here's a look at what we're talking about tonight:
New Friend Request: Respond
Someone to listen to my problems. Someone to do stuff with. Someone to talk to constantly. Someone to hang out with. When you make a list of what qualities you want in a friend, how many of the things on your list involve what that person can do for you? Most of us would have to admit that it's a lot. But the best friendships are ones that are not just about what the other person can do for you - the best friendships also involve how you can be there for someone else. How you can listen, instead of always talking. How you can give someone space when he or she needs it, or just hang out when your friend needs that too. In other words, the best friendships are not centered solely on you - and that's a good thing.
Also, yesterday we started a 3 part series on Reshaping our View of raising our students...today we talk about the girls....
Raising Beautiful Girls
Girls....when they were little you were probably all about the hair bows, the ruffled socks, and the cute shoes. You probably loved getting them ready for the day. They were so cute!
It was easy back then. You thought they were beautiful. Your spouse thought they were beautiful. In their little world, who else mattered?
But little girls grow up. They become 6th graders. Have you ever met a 6th grade little girl? They are just beautiful. They are gangly and unique. They are natural and fresh. They are awkward and wearing braces. They are stuck between a little girl and all grown up.
Like I said, they're beautiful.
But at some point....things begin to change a bit.
One morning when your daughter was fixing her hair....she first put it up in a ponytail, then huffed in disgust, and took it down. Then she curled it. Then she straightened it. Then she pulled it back. She was getting more and more frustrated with her hair.....maybe you offered to help.
And maybe.....probably....at some point she says, "Mom, I hate my hair." Maybe this was mind-blowing to you...the fact that your daughter who was born with a full head of beautiful hair could now make this type of declaration! Total strangers might have stopped her on the street to tell her how beautiful her hair was...maybe she had the most beautiful hair out of anybody in the family, and yet when she looked in the mirror, she hated her hair.
Clearly she was not seeing what you saw.
Our girls need you to reflect back to them the truth about who they are. There is so much more to them than what they look like. They were created to be so much more than a pretty face. But this world works against them. It reflects something totally different back to them.
In the eyes of the world, our girls don't measure up. They aren't thin enough, tall enough, or beautiful enough.
Very few women make it through those early years completely unscathed. But if our girls are to grow up and thrive with confidence in spite of the standards of this world, they need our help.
Here are a few ideas:
Recognize and praise their non-appearance strengths. Are they a fast runner, a great friend, a creative writer, or an excellent dancer? Celebrate the qualities that make them unique.
Encourage and teach them how to take care of themselves. Teach them that they need to get enough rest, exercise, eat right, shower, take care of their skin, brush their teeth, etc...When these things are lacking, it takes a toll on their confidence.
Don't allow yourself to obsess, publicly talk about, or criticize the physical flaws of your girls. As parents we can be the worst. Imagine a mom talking to Aunt (fill-in-the-blank)...."Have you seen Sarah's front tooth? It sticks way out in the front and it's huge!" We look at it like it's a medical or dental issue to be taken care of. Braces are a good thing! We have to remember that our words are a reflection back to our daughters of how we view them.
Celebrate uniqueness. Point out the qualities that you see in them that make them special. We all know that young girl who looks ordinary to the average observer, but when she smiles, the whole room lights up. Point out and celebrate the differences more than you celebrate the sameness.
Teach your daughter from the beginning that God made them. What if your daughter grew up believing that the God of the universe who created her uniquely knew her by name, had a plan for her life, and loved her? How would this change the way that she viewed herself and her purpose in this world?
Some of our girls will struggle with this more than others. It's our job as parents to keep reflecting back to them a healthy and true sense of who they are and who God created them to be.
Hope to see your students tonight!
Heffe
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